Why do guys come up to you after a ride and make statements like, "I'd ride next to you any time! Even side by side! You don't waver. You stay in your lane. You ride like a 'rider.' Etc."
Do you guys say that kind of stuff to each other? If not, what makes you think you need to say that crap to a female rider?
Personally, I find statements like these to me insulting. It takes every ounce of discipline on my part to just smile and politely say 'thank you' while shooting them with daggers from my eyes. These guys are not so great riders themselves. They can't hold their position in a group ride for nothing. Does anyone else besides me find it irritating to ride next to someone who see saws? Then there's the one who drops down on a curve. I don't say anything to them about their riding skills. Why is it necessary for them to make comments about mine? Seriously, I don't know what to say back to them. Anybody got any good come backs?
Even female passangers who come up to me and start drilling me about how awesome it is I ride my own...Isn't it scarey?...Do you do your own maintenance? (when I open my tool bag to help another rider) drives me nuts!
Maybe I just have too many buttons that are too easily pushed or just too sensitive for my own good. For those who don't know me, I've been riding on/off now for about 40 yrs. I am trying not to be a snob but seriously, is this necessary guys? Help a gal out here guys - I just wanna ride with you - I don't need to be critiqued by you.
Hmmm...maybe BBNX should give 'em lessons on how to approach a gal. :) My way of dealing with a lesser skilled rider is to not ride with them from the next stop. I don't say anything to them about their abilities, or lack thereof, during the ride or after the ride. I will say something about it to my close personal friends...just not to their face. Does that make me a bad person? LOL!
We ride. We ride well. Get over it!
Good point...especially the part "We ride. We ride well." As oppossed to we ride like crap and have some sort of death wish. Thought it was everybody's goal to "ride well". And no it does not make you a bad person.
Some interesting points made here in this discussion, I am glad you brought it up.
It looks like you are making it way more complex than it needs to be.
In the minds of most civilians, ladies haven't been riding bikes as long as men, they correlate that in their brain to the fact that if you are female you haven't been riding your own for very long. It isn't complex, it's human nature. Take it as a complement that they are impressed with your riding skills. After they have been in the life for awhile, they will learn better. Maybe.
For dealing with poor riders, or rude riders, or "gushy" passengers... do you always say Thank You and walk away? Why not take that opportunity to teach them how to handle themselves better. You would rather push that responsibility off to someone else rather than waste your valuable time teaching?
No one learns anything until they are shown a better way of doing it. Practice doesn't always make perfect if you keep practicing it wrong and no one will take the time to help you improve. Instead of being upset with someone, take the time to help them out, remove one jerk and the whole world of riding is better.
Thank you for your feedback Paint Wolf! Patience was never one of my strong suits but I am learning. Instead of instantly reacting to the gushy passenger, I now make an effort to be patient and listen. I have a hard time understanding why someone would think that a female riding a m/c is some thing spectacular/special. But when I stop and listen and interact, I learn that it is their self perception which makes what we do all that special to them. I just never 'heard' it before. Mostly it boils down to they perceive they cannot do it - ride a m/c by themself. So when I stop being all full of myself and listen, I really hear what they are saying. If I pick up that they would ride if they were not so afraid, I try to be encouraging. I never realized there were so many women out there who are afraid of so many things I just take in stride. We all have our fears. I think I finally learned to accept others' fears.
As for the male rider who thinks he needs to critique my riding at the end of every ride, well, I am just not sure what to say or feel about that. But for now, I think I'm gonna stick with just saying "thank you' and walk away.
I am always up for learning on how to be a better person!!
I have seen the other side. Two years ago I rode with two other RUBs that I swear were trying to play bumper bikes. So If a biker compliments you I would take it with pride.